Worried You’re Too Sensitive? Here’s Why That’s Not the Whole Picture
TL;DR: Being told you’re “too sensitive” can feel like a criticism, but emotional overwhelm is not a flaw — it’s your nervous system working overtime to keep you safe. For many people navigating ADHD, anxiety, or relational trauma, sensitivity is often misinterpreted and dismissed. With the right support, therapy can help you regulate your emotions, heal old wounds, and begin to experience sensitivity as a source of strength rather than struggle.
If you’ve ever been told you’re “too sensitive,” you know how painful those words can feel. They carry an edge of judgment — as if your emotions are somehow excessive, wrong, or a flaw that needs to be fixed. For many of my clients, especially those navigating ADHD, anxiety, or relational trauma, this label has been following them since childhood.
But here’s the truth: emotional overwhelm is not the same thing as being “too sensitive.” What you’re experiencing isn’t weakness. It’s your nervous system doing its best to keep you safe, even if that safety comes at the cost of feeling grounded or in control.
Let’s unpack why overwhelm happens, why it gets misinterpreted as oversensitivity, and how therapy can help you build a new relationship with your emotions.
Why Emotional Overwhelm Happens
Our brains and bodies are wired for survival.
When you feel overwhelmed, it’s often because your nervous system is registering more input than it can process at once.
For someone with ADHD, this might look like getting flooded when there are too many competing demands on attention. For someone with trauma, overwhelm can surface when reminders of past pain collide with present-day stressors.
In both cases, your system isn’t malfunctioning — it’s overworking. Imagine a smoke alarm that goes off not just for fire, but for burnt toast or steam from the shower. It’s not broken, it’s just hyper-attuned to keeping you safe.
“Too Sensitive”: A Misunderstood Label
So when someone says “you’re too sensitive,” it can mean a couple of things. Sometimes, it’s more about their discomfort with emotions than anything you’ve done wrong. Other times, it may highlight that your nervous system is still on alert — protecting you from threats (real or perceived) even if those threats are no longer present.
Either way, the point is: your sensitivity isn’t the problem. The real issue is how unsupported you’ve felt in navigating it. With the right tools, your sensitivity can actually become a strength — a source of intuition, creativity, and empathy.
ADHD, Anxiety, and Relational Trauma: Why They Intersect With Sensitivity
→ ADHD: People with ADHD often process the world more intensely. A flood of external stimuli — noises, interruptions, shifting demands — can make it feel like there’s no buffer. What others interpret as “overreacting” is really your brain trying to manage input without a working filter.
→ Anxiety: Anxiety keeps your nervous system scanning for what might go wrong. When you’re already hyper-alert, emotions can feel bigger, faster, and harder to regulate. It’s not “too sensitive” — it’s your system living in overdrive.
→ Relational trauma: Growing up in environments where your feelings were dismissed, criticized, or punished wires you to anticipate that same dismissal later. Being told you’re “too sensitive” often reinforces old wounds, making emotions feel even more overwhelming.
How Therapy Helps You Find Steadiness
One of the most healing experiences therapy offers is learning that emotions aren’t dangerous. Instead of being something to suppress or fear, they can become signals you understand and work with. In my practice, I weave together three primary modalities to support this process:
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing)
EMDR helps your brain reprocess experiences that still carry emotional charge. If past memories trigger overwhelm, EMDR allows you to revisit them in a way that lowers intensity. Over time, your system learns it doesn’t have to sound the alarm every time you’re reminded of old pain.
Internal Family Systems (IFS)
IFS gives language and compassion to the parts of you that carry sensitivity. Instead of shaming yourself for feeling “too much,” IFS helps you meet those parts with curiosity: the anxious part, the overwhelmed part, the perfectionist part. This builds inner trust and reduces the sense that your emotions are uncontrollable.
Sensorimotor Psychotherapy
Because overwhelm often shows up in the body, Sensorimotor work teaches you to notice and shift physical responses. Simple grounding, movement, and awareness exercises help your nervous system re-regulate in the moment, giving you practical tools to interrupt spirals of flooding or shutdown.
Learn more about Sensorimotor Psychotherapy here.
Why Intensives Can Be Especially Effective
For many people, especially those who have been labeled “too sensitive,” weekly therapy sometimes feels too slow. That’s where therapy intensives come in. Intensives allow you to spend several hours in focused work, using EMDR, IFS, and Sensorimotor techniques in combination.
The benefit is momentum: instead of getting flooded again and again without resolution, intensives help you stay with the process long enough for your system to truly shift. Clients often leave feeling lighter, more grounded, and more hopeful than they thought possible in such a short time.
Learn more about therapy intensives here.
Reframing Sensitivity as Strength
Imagine what it would feel like if your sensitivity wasn’t something to apologize for — but something you could use as a guide.
Sensitivity, when supported, often leads to:
Stronger intuition about what feels right or wrong for you.
Greater empathy and depth in relationships.
Rich creativity and the ability to notice details others miss.
Therapy doesn’t erase sensitivity — it helps you find balance so you’re not constantly overwhelmed by it.
Closing Thoughts
Being told you’re “too sensitive” can leave a scar, but overwhelm is not weakness — it’s a sign your system has been working overtime. With the right support, you can expand your capacity, feel steadier, and experience your emotions as something that empowers you instead of something that controls you.
If this resonates, I’d love to help you move beyond the “too sensitive” label and into a different relationship with your emotions. Through EMDR, IFS, Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, and therapy intensives, I support clients in building regulation, self-trust, and lasting relief.
I offer virtual therapy in Virginia and in-person sessions in Washington, DC. If you’re ready to feel more grounded, resilient, and at home in your sensitivity, I’d be glad to walk alongside you.
Looking for a therapist in Washington, D.C. who specializes in helping sensitive, overwhelmed adults find balance through trauma-informed care?
Take your first step towards feeling grounded, more resilient, and at home in your emotions.
(Washington, D.C., Virginia, & Maryland residents only)
About the author
Margot Lamson, LICSW, is a licensed psychotherapist offering in-person and virtual therapy in Washington, D.C. and Virginia. She is trained in multiple trauma-focused approaches, including EMDR, IFS, and Sensorimotor Psychotherapy to support clients seeking meaningful and lasting healing. Margot also provides intensives, combining evidence-based and holistic techniques, to help clients achieve significant progress and feel better faster in a focused, supportive setting.
