Untangling Dissociation: What It Is, Why It Happens, and How You Can Heal in Psychotherapy
Have you ever found yourself spacing out during a conversation, losing time, or feeling like you’re floating outside of your body during stress? Maybe you catch yourself going through the motions of your day while feeling oddly disconnected—from your emotions, your memories, or even your sense of self. If so, you’re not alone. These are all forms of dissociation, and they’re far more common than you might think—especially among those who are navigating the long-term effects of trauma.
As a trauma therapist who works with driven, creative, and emotionally intuitive clients, I see dissociation show up in so many subtle ways. And I also see the shame that comes with it. You may wonder, Why can’t I just stay present? What’s wrong with me?
Let’s start here: There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. Dissociation is not a flaw—it’s a survival strategy. And like many survival strategies, it makes sense… until it doesn’t anymore.
What is Dissociation, Really?
Dissociation is your brain’s way of protecting you when things feel too overwhelming to process in real time. It’s like a circuit breaker tripping when too much electricity runs through a wire—it keeps you safe from overload.
But it’s also important to know this: dissociation exists on a spectrum. And most people experience some form of it from time to time. Ever driven home and realized you don’t quite remember the last five minutes of the drive? Zoned out during a Zoom meeting? That’s dissociation, too.
So if you recognize yourself in this, please don’t panic. You’re not broken or beyond help. This doesn’t mean there’s something deeply wrong with you. In fact, your brain is doing exactly what it was designed to do—protect you. Still, while these responses are deeply human and understandable, they can become problematic when they’re frequent, intense, or start interfering with your relationships, work, and overall sense of well-being.
For many of my clients, especially those with high-functioning anxiety and perfectionist tendencies, dissociation is a coping tool they learned early on.
If you grew up in an environment where your emotions were dismissed, minimized, or even punished, you may have developed a pattern of disconnecting from those emotions altogether.
It allowed you to function. To survive. To please. To achieve.
But now, as an adult, this same protective mechanism might be causing problems. You might feel like you're on autopilot. Struggling to access your feelings. Battling intrusive thoughts or moments of panic you don’t understand. You might find yourself bouncing between burnout and avoidance, stuck in a cycle that feels impossible to shift.
That stuckness? That’s the echo of unprocessed trauma and dissociation working behind the scenes.
Dissociation is not a flaw—it’s a survival strategy.
And like many survival strategies, it makes sense… until it doesn’t anymore.
Healing dissociation isn’t about forcing yourself to be more “present.” It’s about creating safety within your system so that presence becomes possible.
Are you ready to feel more present and at home with yourself?
Why Traditional Talk Therapy Often Isn’t Enough
Here’s the thing: traditional talk therapy can be incredibly validating and helpful, especially in increasing insight and building coping skills. But when it comes to trauma and dissociation, insight alone often isn’t enough.
That’s because trauma isn’t just stored in your thoughts—it lives in your body and your nervous system. Dissociation isn’t happening on a rational level; it’s an embodied response. And no amount of talking about what happened can fully access or heal what’s happening inside.
This is why brain- and body-based therapies—like EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), IFS (Internal Family Systems), and Sensorimotor Psychotherapy—are so essential. They go beyond surface-level insight and into the root experiences that shaped your nervous system’s responses. They help you process trauma, not just analyze it.
Why Intensives Can Be an Ethical and Powerful Approach to Dissociation
Many of my clients who struggle with dissociation benefit most from therapy intensives—extended sessions (ranging from 90 minutes to 6 hours) that allow us to go deeper without being bound by the clock. When it comes to trauma, especially when dissociation is present, having time to really settle into the work, regulate, explore, and integrate can make a profound difference.
Intensives give us the space to follow your nervous system’s pace—not rush it or cut it short. That means more depth, more clarity, and more transformation in a shorter time. For clients feeling especially stuck or overwhelmed by chronic stress or burnout, this format can be a game-changer. And with the modalities of Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), and Internal Family Systems (IFS), we get to go at a pace that holistically integrates your natural insight and body’s wisdom.
And ethically? I believe this model honors the depth of the work. It gives you the capacity to do what your brain and body have been waiting for—to finally, safely process what was never fully processed.
Click here to learn more about therapy intensives.
Tangible Tools to Ground and Reconnect When You’re Dissociating
While deeper therapy work is often necessary to fully address dissociation, there are also supportive tools you can begin using now. Here are a few practices I regularly recommend to clients:
Orienting to the Present Moment
Look around and name 5 things you can see, 4 you can touch, 3 you can hear, 2 you can smell, and 1 you can taste. This “5-4-3-2-1” method helps re-engage your senses and signal safety to your nervous system.Weighted Objects
A weighted blanket or lap pad can provide comforting input to your body and help anchor you during moments of disconnection.Movement with Intention
Gentle, rhythmic movement—like walking, rocking, or swaying—can help integrate disassociated energy and bring you back into connection with your body."Name the Dissociation" Practice
Try saying aloud (or internally): “I’m noticing I feel far away or numb. That makes sense. I’m safe now.” Naming it can reduce shame and give your nervous system permission to settle.Creative Expression
Drawing, journaling, dancing—these are powerful ways to give shape to what feels vague or disconnected internally. Even if what comes out feels messy, that’s okay. Messy is still healing.
You Deserve More Than Just “Getting By”
If any part of this resonated, I want you to know: you don’t have to keep white-knuckling your way through life. You don’t have to keep checking out, shrinking, or pushing yourself to stay “functional” while silently unraveling inside.
There is a path toward clarity, connection, and calm. There is a way to feel more you again.
Healing dissociation isn’t about forcing yourself to be more “present.” It’s about creating safety within your system so that presence becomes possible. It’s about getting to know the parts of you that have worked so hard to protect you. It’s about integrating—not erasing—your past so you can show up fully in your life now.
If you’re feeling stuck, burned out, or like something just isn’t clicking anymore—let’s talk.
Whether you’re curious about therapy intensives or want to explore weekly support, there’s space for you here. Healing is possible. And you don’t have to do it alone.
Ready to start feeling more present? Schedule a free consultation today and take the first step toward lasting clarity and peace.
Looking to connect with a therapist who specializes in brain and body-based therapies that treat dissociation and help you feel more present?
Reach out today to talk about how therapy with me can help you expedite your healing.
(Washington, D.C. and Virginia residents only)
About the author
Margot Lamson, LICSW, is a licensed psychotherapist offering in-person and virtual therapy in Washington, D.C. and Virginia. She is trained in multiple trauma-focused approaches, including EMDR, IFS, and Sensorimotor Psychotherapy to support clients seeking meaningful and lasting healing. Margot also provides intensives, combining evidence-based and holistic techniques, to help clients achieve significant progress and feel better faster in a focused, supportive setting.
